Always something there to remind me

Sometimes when I have a diet Coke it smells like booze. I think it's from all the watered down Jack and diet's I've had in my lifetime. They all start to taste the same, and now I think it's just the diet Coke that reminds me of drinking.

Sometimes cigarettes remind me of booze, too. This afternoon I was smoking a cigarette and it just suddenly flashed on me that it reminded me of booze. Maybe even tasted like it.

I'm not really thinking about drinking at all. I have had the occasional, "wow, a glass of wine is what I would normally use to cure this," kind of thought, but not the desire to drink. I haven't had any booze dreams or anything like that, either. It's pretty amazing not to have turned to a drink at this point. Everything is upside down: I'm in the looking glass. I can see normality on the other side, but I just can't reach it.