Like the Lord

Sister Bonnie said, "Don't crucify yourself between two thieves: the regrets of yesterday, and the fear of tomorrow."

I never realized I had so many regrets until I started doing my fourth step. There are so many things that hold me back, because they take up so much of my brain and my time to think about. I think about them before I make moves, which is good, because sometimes it keeps me out of trouble, but sometimes it makes me fearful of moving forward. Life is change; life is forward movement. You have to keep moving, always. So don't regret the past, but don't wish to shut the door on it, either.

Ah, the fear of tomorrow. I've been having a lot of that lately. What is going to happen to me? Will I remain unemployed for a long time? Will I get this part time job? What if I do? What will happen then? Will I find a place of my own anytime soon? There is so much "unknown" out there right now, and I'm afraid of it. But I know about moving forward, and I can't be complacent.

So don't crucify yourself between your fears and your regrets. There is no place in sobriety or emotional sobriety for paralysis because of these things. You have to grow and move on in order to experience life, but don't throw away these things either. Learn from them.