Sobriety makes life easier

I was talking to Adam the other night about being sober. "Have you given up on AA?" he asked. Yes, I think I have. I mean, it's a great program, and it helps a lot of people, but I'm just bad with groups. I love to join groups, but I don't last long. I'm just not that great of a social being, especially while I'm depressed. It was a nice way to help me get started being sober.

But what I've found is I no longer tell myself I CAN'T have alcohol. I just decided not to have it. I've made a choice, not a provision in my life. I decided that for today I don't want to drink. Maybe I'll have a drink tomorrow, but today I'm ok without it. In fact, I feel better. My depression is lighter, even. My meds work better. I'm all around better off for not having alcohol in my life.

And what's cool is sometimes restaurants have neat non-alcoholic drinks to try. This restaurant we went to made it's own ginger ale, which was fizzy and cool to drink. I never would have tried it before. I would have just gone straight for the alcohol.

Being sober is something I think that has saved my life in the past few months. I know if I had still been drinking when I was off meds I would have tried to kill myself instead of just thinking about it. I know now that though I may spend my days sitting in front of the computer, at least I'm not spending it in front of a bar and sleeping with random strangers, because that's what I would be doing. I've learned that you can go to concerts sober. You can have holidays sober. You can go through job loss and major depression sober. And it makes it all easier.

Why didn't I think of this before?