Promises, promises

I've never really understood the promises. I mean, I understand the words, and I can see how they make sense, but there are a few I just don't get yet.

Here they are:

THE A.A. PROMISES

If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

Self-seeking will slip away. I understand that as the selfishness by which we live our lives will stop. Which is a very good thing, but it seems also that AA is a kind of selfish program. Putting your recovery above all other things (including your partners and children) seems a little on the selfish side to me.

I also understand that a lot of drunks used and abused their bank accounts, and that the bad behavior will stop. But I've always been afraid of economic insecurity even though I'm actually just fine (well, not at the present moment). Since it's not related to my alcohol troubles, will it really go away? Am I just suddenly going to calm down about it? What if I think that's a bad idea? I'm not sure my HP gives a damn about my finances, either.

I like these, though. It's very true that I can put one foot in front of the other and not have to worry about mis-stepping. My memory is coming back very nicely, and if I still smoked I wouldn't have to worry about lighting myself on fire, anymore. There are definitely promises that have come true. We'll see about the others.