Let's build somethng together

"What do you want to try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did / didn’t go for it?" I'm digging these Reverb posts.

You know what I'd like to try? Longevity. Longevity, you say? How odd. Well, I have that impulsivity problem we talked about before. I like to jump from place to place, from thing to thing. I can't seem to stay in a job for more than a year and a half before I just have to get out, and I take the first thing that comes along. I don't wait to see what's coming, I just jump.

So what I want to try is longevity. I would like to make a commitment to my next job, and stay. Stay for maybe 5 years. Stay and grow in a job. Build relationships, and really give it a shot. I would like to move someplace, or even stay here, and stay for another 5 years at least. I would like to maybe get in a relationship that lasts more than a year and a half.

See, that seems to be my breaking point. After a year and a half I get bored with everything and everyone. I need something new, something refreshing. I get too close to people, or they get too close to me, and I have to push them away. I get too settled in a job, and I have to run away. Why am I afraid of commitment?

Wow, I just realized that. I'm afraid of commitment. Huh.