Depression can make you smoke

Depression and smoking can go hand in hand. "24 percent of surveyed callers to the California Smokers' Helpline currently suffered from major depression and 17 percent of callers had mild depression." Those smokers that had depression were less likely to stay quit than their non-depressed counterparts.

I think that's what has happened to me in the past. I was smoke free for over a year once, and then something happened with my mom and my first reaction was to go buy a pack of cigarettes. Once you get over the smell and taste of the first one (which makes you gag) you can easily continue. I know how silly that sounds, but man is smoking one hard addiction to quit. I've had more moments where I want to smoke than I have where I want to drink.

The Abilify has been really helpful. I think it has kept me out of depression during this rough period, and really helped. I hope not to switch back into depression, but the longer I'm unemployed the more unhappy I seem to be getting. It's just a lot of rejection and a huge time suck. All I do is blog and apply for jobs. I'd like to be working! I would like to hang out in an office with people other than my dad, even though he's cool.

I hope, though, if I'm unemployed for a while longer I don't just pick back up the smoking. I'd like to stay quit this time. I like how I smell; I like how my mouth tastes; I like that I'm not gross.