The plan 2

Ok. I need a plan for when I feel like this. Who can I call? Who do I reach out to? When I think of names all I can think of are the reasons why I shouldn't call them.

So wait, maybe what I need to decide is what's best for me when I feel like that? What do I want? Jesus, I don't know. I don't want to leave the house because I start to get paranoid about accidents and metro cars. I start getting really scared of accidental death and dismemberment. I know it doesn't make sense to be suicidal and yet scared of something happening, but that's what happens.

I don't know what I would want from people, so I don't know the right person to call. I suppose having the person in the same general vicinity is a good right step. Someone who can get to me. Yeah, being with someone else is good. Being alone is bad.

Sleep is good. Sleep is less confusing. I'm all confused, now. My brain is just all up in arms. Nothing is making sense, and it's giving me a headache. I'm starting to feel crazy again, and I haven't even had any caffeine. Time for more Seroquel.