I can't sleep

I can't sleep. I'm sitting here, writing away at one in the morning cause I can't sleep. I think I'm tired, but I'm not, really. There's a lot on my mind right now. My body is just keeping up with my brain.

Adam is already asleep, tucked away nice and comfy in the bed, and here I sit. I could be warm and cuddly in my nice feather comforter, and instead, I'm out here sitting on the floor typing to you people. Not that you're not all lovely people, but I'd rather be sleeping.

I already played with the neighbors' cat and snuck a cigarette. Adam, when you read this, sorry, I just couldn't hold out any longer. Two days was a lot! I got pretty far.

So, what wisdom on sobriety do I have to impart? Sober sleeping is tough. Usually I would have a glass of wine and that would unwind me enough to sleep. But now, I don't know what to do to quiet my mind. That's why it's nice to have a blog. I can talk to myself without annoying the other people in my apartment.

I suppose I just need to lie down and do it. You know, maybe I'll take my ipod with me. I'll sleep with it on and just try and relax. Like we talk about, there are bees in my head (or in the program they call them the committee). They're buzzing about making me think untrue thoughts. Everything is just the way it should be, really. I have to believe that. I can't control the events of the present or the future. I just have to be and let things happen as they may. Step three - let go. I just have to keep reminding myself that a lot. Let go. Relax, Anne, relax.