Feelings, nothing more than....

It's really strange when you realize you've never really felt a feeling before. You know, like FELT it. Not just thought, "Huh, I should be ____ ." But really felt it.

Being sober makes you feel everything. All of it. You can't drink it away or shove the bad feelings down with alcohol. Instead, you have to learn to deal with them as they come.

Feeling feelings is hard. There are so many of them, and a lot of them hurt. Love, fear, jealousy, pain, guilt, shame. All these things can come up in your daily living and yet nothing can block it out like the drugs and alcohol did.

So what do you do!? I suppose the answer is the rely on the steps and the help of my sponsor to get me through. Following the program and writing things down, talking about it in meetings, doing the steps. I think these are the things that will get me to a better place where I can feel the feelings and not have to be scared of them.