Monday, November 1, 2010

Lies!


Oh, Mr. Sponsor Pants, sometimes you are speaking to me. Lies are always bad. Really. It's never as bad as you think it's going to be when you tell the truth. Often, we lie because we don't have faith in other people to handle things. You can't make decisions for others, and you can't know how they will react unless they know the truth of the situation. Lies of omission count, too. They're still lies.

I do it all the time, though. I try to protect myself by keeping everything smooth - not telling the whole truth because it might upset someone, or someone might get mad at me for something.

I've been lying to my sponsor all week. I haven't been to a meeting since Thursday when I saw her last. She asks every day if I've been or am going, and I lie and say yes. I old her bluntly this morning that I was going to hit a meeting tonight, when I had no intention of actually doing it. I know, I know, I feel better when I go to meetings, but I'm just so damn lazy. Not that it's really far away or anything, but I get stuck on this damn couch and just don't move.

It's kind of ridiculous. She's an adult, she can handle the truth. I know it will get me in trouble, and she won't like it, but why am I afraid of a 100 lb girl? Just because I told her I'd do something and I didn't? You bet I am. So I need to be honest from now on, and that starts with going to a meeting tonight.

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