Addiction is a bitch

"One sense of 'normal' is statistically normal: what everyone else does. The other is the sense we mean when we talk about the normal operating range of a piece of machinery: what works best." Paul Graham

He's really talking about our technology addiction, but I think it applies pretty well to our addiction to alcohol and drugs. It's hard to not do what everyone else does! All my friends drink, and they drink to have fun, and drink to get drunk, and drink to celebrate life. They drink all the time... but they stop at some point, and I never could. So my relationship with booze became unmanageable. Whenever it was around I was on it until I blacked out. And it was "normal" to drink that much, for me at least.

So now, what works best is not drinking, and that's going to be my new "normal." Boozing to the point of blackout never worked best, it just worked for the purposes of drowning my sorrows or dulling my emotions. Now I need to trust that this new normal will be the right path. I need to trust that this spiritual path is going to work; that I can become more spiritual and that God will help me stop drinking.

Keep coming back, it works if you work it. At least, that's what they keep telling me.