Meeting anxiety

They say when you don't want to go to a meeting that's when you need one the most. There's a great meeting tonight with a speaker who speaks the whole time. You get to hear a lot of someone's story, and their wisdom. A lot of people really have great wisdom to share. I like hearing about how others have picked themselves up and found a program that gives them a path in life which is so different from their original path.

Amanda just texted to ask if I would like to go to dinner with the girls beforehand. My first instinct was to say no; it's not like I'm doing anything here, I just am anti-social. But I said yes. So I'm off to hamburgers with the ladies of AA and then on to the Friday night meeting.

Sometimes I just get anxious about this kind of stuff. What am I going to talk about? Can I just sit and listen without anyone thinking I'm awkward? Am I awkward? Usually after a few drinks I'm a lot of fun and can always think of something entertaining to talk about. Now, I wait for those silences. I'm just going to have to develop the confidence that I always lacked in these situations.

A lot of folks have said how shy they actually are, and how anti-social, and that they began using alcohol as a cure for that. I think that's right on target.

So off I go to sober dinner!