Bipolar can make you moon people

Ok, last one for tonight. Just a short story:

When I was 15 (I lied last time, it was 15 not 16) and living at Diane's in New England, my mom was on a serious manic high. My dad had sent me to stay with Diane to get me out of the house while they negotiated the divorce. What I didn't know, was when I came home I'd be shipped off to boarding school.

One day, my mom just showed up. She said she wanted to get away for a bit, and my cousin and I hesitantly let her in the house. It's like a vampire - don't let the manic in the house! Diane had this huge Victorian with three floors and a basement apartment, where I was living. My mom took over the attic floor.

One day, I was across the street at the frat house learning how to keg toss (I was pretty good at it. All those sports made me strong enough to pick one up) and my mom called out from the top window for me to come home. I had spent the last 2 months without any real supervision, and was learning how to be an adult. I said no, and continued what I was doing. And all of a sudden, she mooned us. My 45 year old mother pulled down her pants and mooned a frat house. Seriously? I slunk inside, totally embarrassed.

Eventually, mom just got crazier and crazier. One day she came home from God knows where, with McDonald's, and told me to get in the car cause we were going home. I took one look at her, and knew if I got in the car, I was going to die. She was going to drive us off a cliff in the mountains, and I'd never make it home. I refused. She got really angry, packed my bag, and put it in the trunk. I made it look like I was getting in the car, and then asked to get something out of the trunk. I grabbed my stuff and b-lined it back into the house.

By then, my 6 year old cousin was hiding underneath the kitchen table. "I don't want her to take me, too," he whined. How frightening for a little child. Even he knew she was dangerous.

My mom called the police and accused my cousin of kidnapping me. Yep. The police came, and my cousin immediately called my grandfather. I told him what was happening, and he said under no circumstances was I to get in the car with her. He would buy me a plane ticket the next day.

I stood on the front lawn between my mom and the house (where my cousin was hiding with her son), and told the police officer that he was sentencing me to death if he made me get in that car. He took me seriously, and asked my mom to leave.

I didn't see her again for a month or so, until I was kidnapped and sent to boarding school, but that's another story.