Health insurance is a necessary evil

I'm totally resentful of my health insurance company. They keep hanging up on me while they try to transfer me to the 32rd person who is supposed to help me do one damn simple thing.

I'm resentful at the whole process of health insurance. How can they deny the sickest people treatment under the guise of "pre-existing condition?" Isn't that illegal? Shouldn't it be? Luckily, even with my diagnosis of bipolar, I (knock on wood) haven't had any trouble getting health insurance through my places of employ. I know people who have had cancer who now have trouble getting health insurance, and it just seems so ridiculous. People who have pre-existing conditions need healthcare the most in order to stay well and not get sick again. Without it, I couldn't afford my medications. Sometimes I see on the receipt that my meds, for three months, would be upwards of $800. It costs me $50. I would be unmedicated if it weren't for insurance.

I had no insurance during college, and I was crazy. Even my alcoholism took off. I was trying to cover my incredible mania with something, anything! I was so manic that I was paranoid and freaked out at almost anything. And then I would swing into deep depressions that had me crying during class, or just generally acting like it was the end of the world.

So I'm mad at insurance companies, and yet grateful for them. I suppose all resentments will be a like and dislike balance for me. I'm unfortunately good at seeing the good in anything. Damn optimist.